We've been here for a long time and we'll be here till we die

I woke up this morning to the sound of lawn mowing outside my window; it brought me back to summers at larkspur, when our neighbor would mow his lawn at 8 or 9 am. For some reason it struck me especially strongly, the distance between that point in time and this one, and not just temporally or spatially, but personally. (Maybe it was that I'm on a caffeine fast and the middle-times between awake & sleeping are extra tenacious). In the last year there has been radical change all around, and I found myself just sitting in the comfy chair by myself for half an hour [pre-breakfast!], staring out at the pine trees, letting it sink in. Percolate, if you will. Mmm. Coffee. Yeah I think it is related to caffeine - caffeine speeds up your heart and makes you tense so the minutes fly by, so you're kinda constantly stirred out of the present moment. And when you don't take the time to just sit around and think about it all, your unconscious lets things build up and build up. You gotta watch for that.

Current Music: A Silver Mt Zion, He has left us alone but shafts of light sometimes grace the corners of our rooms